SIGNS ON CHURCH PROPERTY:

"No God-No Peace. Know God-Know Peace."

"Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!"

"Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins."

"Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"

"People are like tea bags - you have to put them inhot water before you know how strong they are."

"When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right."

"Fight truth decay-study the Bible daily."

"How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Nonsmoking?"

"Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives":

"Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."

"It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."

"Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."

"If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."

"If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again."

"Forbidden fruit creates many jams."

"This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" --------- (U R)

"In the dark? Follow the Son."

"Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up."

"If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."

Submitted by K. Strooh

WHERE ARE OUR PRIORITIES ?

Funny how a $50.00 bill looks so big when we take it to church and so small when we take it to the store.

Funny how big an hour serving God looks and how small 60 minutes are when spent playing golf, fishing etc.

Funny how laborious it is to read a chapter in the Bible and how easy it is to read 3,000 pages of a best selling novel.

Funny how we believe what newspapers say but question what the Bible says.

Funny how we cannot think of anything to say when we pray and do not have any difficulty thinking of things to talk to about to a friend.

Funny how we need two or three weeks to fit a church event into our schedule but can adjust it for a social event at the last minute.

Funny how folks want to sit on the front row at a ball game or concert but scramble to get a back seat at church services.

Funny how difficult to memorize scripture to share the simple gospel message but how easy to hear and repeat gossip.

Submitted by K. Strooh